What the house looks like

Photogchic asked about the house that Nettus and I will be moving into in a few days. The best way to give a picture is of course to upload one, so here you are - specially for you!

It's a medium sized house the size of a Swedish apartment, but that's good. A bigger house would only be more expensive and take more time to clean! It's a bit run down, like many things are in Africa, but that's what makes it such a good project! We won't be rushing things though, because full time work commences on Monday. Looking forward to that more than anything else right now!!

The garden is nice and full of potential (another of those Ishtar mottoes!)-

... and the best thing is that I'll be moving my girls in with me!

Well, they won't actually move into the house, but I don't think Arwen would want that... She likes her sand and her playmate Sahara.

Well well, got to rush, the clock is ticking and I still have a lot of important little details to tick off from my ToDo list before I go. But the ToDo is actually shrinking!!! I didn't think it would happen, but Nettus and I got together yesterday and got 90% of the packing done which is something I normally do a few hours before I leave. Now I've been spending the morning going through important [mahi manci] papers and will pop over and have lunch with my family, before I head into town for some last minute errands. Can't believe we're leaving tomorrow, or rather, some time tonight.

Take care you all, and see you in Niger!
Ishtar

Leaving soon

Only a few days left until Nettus and I arrive in Zinder, which will be really green at this time of the year. Despite the humidity, it will be a treat (for the eyes!) to watch Niger in its green cover and although the rainy season isn't going to last for that much longer, it's been so long since I experienced it that even just a couple of weeks are precious.

That said, we will arrive on Friday evening and start work on Monday, so we'll have two days to try to get our house in order - at least to the point where you can move about freely and not have to crawl over any furniture in order to reach the bathroom...

I don't know when I'll have the time to ride, but I do know that I'll be quick to walk over and give our whinnying girls a hug. Don't know how soon I can move them in with us, but we'll just take one day at a time - the African way...

Ishtar

Does money make you happy?

When preparing for an Eden presentation I'll be holding tomorrow, I came upon this picture (taken by an Eden field worker) which I just had to share.

Copyright Eden Foundation

I seem to be one of the few Western/African bloggers who do not believe that technology is going to solve Africa's numerous issues. I am fortunate however to be working with the least developed area of the least developed country in the world, where "the poor" laugh and the children are full of life.

There's a funny thing about the world I was born into. We keep telling ourselves that money doesn't buy happiness, but any time I turn on the TV or listen to the prominent voices directing potential buyers into an even narrower capitalistic society which is meant to add more items to your material collection which in turn is supposed to make you feel better about yourself - I wonder how our logic adds up. We say money doesn't buy happiness, but I really wonder - does anybody in the Western world still believe that? If so, why do we keep on buying so much and why do we continue pushing our own lifestyle onto every other society whenever we have the chance?

In my book, there is beauty in contentment. Having "enough" is an incredible wealth and fills most of us with satisfaction. Having more than one knows what to do with only makes life complicated. It is my personal belief that neither technology nor financial investments will ever save Africa from poverty, but the Eden trees growing in Tanout are bringing hope and inspiration as we speak.

Copyright Eden Foundation

And I am happy just to be a part of it.

Ishtar

Here's a task for you!

No time for words as there is so much to do (how come by ToDo list never shrinks no matter how many things I tick off?) but how about a picture where you get to do the commenting? Eagerly awaiting your interpretations of what Ishtar associates with the picture above.

Ishtar

Time for tea

I'm such a coffee person (a habit I picked up when I began teaching), but there are times when I really long for tea. Not the Lipton type that you drink with friends on a cold dark Swedish winter night waitning for warmer days.

No, I long for the Nigerien type of tea drinking. The one where you go socializing and a friend or neighbour brings out the coal, the mint leaves and the precious sugar. The one that takes ages to reach perfection and which is served in small quantity but with such rich taste that one sip is amply sufficient. That is the tea I am longing for right now.

Unfortunately, musing has little effect on reality, so in the meantime, I will continue drinking coffee (literwise, or it seems...) and do the best I can to complete everything in time so that on Thursday next week, I am on that plane going south. And when I get the opportunity to enjoy that "glass of tea" with the good company that follows, I will let you know.

Ishtar

Soon and very soon...

Only nine days left until I leave (according to my own blog countdown)! I wonder if those nine days could have extended hours so that I will have enough time to get everything done before I leave...?

I had a good laugh when Facebooking earlier today. A South African blogger thought that his ToDo list was "so long it should be published as a book". I have a similar ToDo list stashed away somewhere on my computer. I am very much aware of its existence, but not so much of the details, since I stubbornly refuse to open it up (I have a tendency of adding more things to my ToDo list than I mark off as "done"). I am already aware of the numerous things that need to be done before I leave, but looking at the whole mass will only blurry my vision and motivation to get any task done at all. So right now, I'm concentrating on the little things (kind of becoming an Ishtar statement lately) and my only drastic decision so far has been to not take on any more payable work before I leave even though I still need the money. But there are only nine days left (most of them already booked) and I need the time to get everything prepared and in order. Can't leave any Ishtar mess behind!

But seeing one can always look at the glass as half full or half empty, I choose to tell myself that there are still nine whole days left! Imagine that - so much time!!! And all of a sudden, I feel sooooo much better. :-)

Cheers!
Ishtar

Princesses in the world

Yesterday, I came over a picture that Nettus took on our street a few months ago. It was a bit blurry, but when that smile and those gorgeous eyes and chubby cheeks, I just fell in love with the little girl who so generously flashed them. Despite the fact that the photographer was an unknown nasara who had just been invited in by her older siblings.

She made me think of all those little girls all over the world who want to be princesses from time to time. (True, Ishtar was never such a girl; she settled for the Queen title right from the start but that is an other issue...) The point is, we look at our own society, and we think "aha, this trait or this behaviour is specific for us!" But if we look around, we will find elements of what we believe to be true to own society is all sorts of form and variation all over the world. So why do we keep telling ourselves that we are so different? We do we look for differences?

I am all for the differences of individuals, because I don't believe that any man or woman is the other alike. I also think that it is exactly those differences that makes the world such a rich place.

But when it comes to society however, I see no reason to divide and set up fences and walls. Does it matter that I am a nasara? Does it matter that my father is of one nationality and my mother of another, making me neither, or both? Does it matter if I celebrate Christmas or not? Does it matter if I eat smoke salmon but not sushi or roasted crickets?

No, I didn't think so. Most of you judge me by what I do with my life - not by my genetical heritage or social affiliation.

If only we could judge people by their heart's desires and not by the colour of their skin or the society they belong to. What an intriguing place the world would then be!

Ishtar

Beautiful Africa's 3rd edition is out!

Wow! The 3rd (!) edition of the Beautiful Africa blog carnival is now available at the BA homepage, sharing 10 quality posts about Africa in all its different colors. I hope you enjoy them as much as I did! If things continue evolving the way they do, we will have to think about having the carnival more often.

I'm happy to inform that the next edition will be reviewed by Szavanna, but don't worry because the submission links remain the same.

Wishing you a pleasant reading & don't forget to leave a comment!
Ishtar

July keywords

"A few posts ago", I wrote that I would posting July month's favorite keywords "in a few days". Well, that was nearly two weeks ago, so, not wanting to be the one to create false hope, here they are!

I am pleased to see that you've been busy speculating on what keyword topped the list after "Ishtar" (the main protagonist) and "Hanna Grönberg" (one of Ishtar's main commentators and good friend (and also a very international person with a naija style social network)). The correct answer was not "Sunbathing" (although if you would put together all the different forms of Swedish sunbathing that has been typed, it might have turned out the winner!) nor "Heartbroken", but actually Vision-Pioneers. Here's the list!

1. vision-pioneers

Ah, didn't know people were that interested in finding out what my sister went to after her dissertation. But here's the link, in case you didn't know how to find it...

2. sunbathing, sunbathing sweden, sunbathing in sweden (plus a 100 different versions!)

Why this is such a top keyword, I have no idea and I will not even speculate on why Swedish people’s sunbathing habits are such a huge global issue. Why isn’t anybody interested in “Nigerien people delighting in the sun?”

3. african reflection foundation.org

Didn’t know such thing even existed!

4. aid not helping famine

That depends on what kind of aid you’re talking about. If you refer to cash hand-outs, then no, I agree that isn’t helping. If you look at Eden’s work however, you’ll see that they've had great results!

5. barber in africa

Well, seeing I don’t like to have my hair shaved all too often, I actually don’t know an African barber personally. But perhaps that is a project for the future? Having my hair shaved African (male) fashion? Maybe something to make a poll about... Who thinks Ishtar should shave her hair? A friend of me actually offered me €300 once for shaving it - then took it back when he realized I was actually considering doing it...

6. best country to raise your kids

Still topping the charts! I actually wrote another post about it.

7. bororo feast niger celebration date 2007, bororo men images

You have them right here!

8. cancerians born on the 18th of july forecasts 2007

I am sorry to say but I have absolutely no idea what you’re referring to! This is worse than the Alsacian riding school – although this time, I don’t know how to put together a picture!

9. cia agent portraits

And why exactly am I being associated with those…?

10. daniel zinder, wedding

I am still not marrying Daniel in Zinder!

11. desertification due to livestock - pictures

You should read Eden’s article Desertification – a Threat to Sahel.

12. hausa lessons

I’ve been thinking about giving out Hausa lessons on my blog, but first I need to learn the language!

13. horse foal gestation 367 days

Yes, but in order to have anything to say about that, your mare first needs to be pregnant. After that, she needs to carry her foal without loosing it, which mine unfortunately did. I may try again though!

14. how is beauty protrayed in africa

You really want to know…? From where I come from, a plump healthy body with a broad backside is as “deluxe” as it gets. Funny thing really that my friends in Africa dream of looking like the average Swede, while all my Swedish friends dream of looking like the average Nigerien. What is it with us humans and wanting to achieve what is the furthest away from us???

15. ishtar blogspot sahara race track

No, no, you got it all wrong… I used to be involved in Zinder’s race track, but that’s not located in the Sahara desert.

16. ishtar forest, ishtar sport, square of ishtar

Interesting, interesting. And all these things can be found where…?

17. june 2007 iam from cypruse looking for job here is my email address

Ugo Daniels, did you write this?

18. june 2007 iam from nigeria looking for job here is my email address

Ugo Daniels, did you write this one too??? Didn’t know you were done with your studies…

19. kano jalla

Yes, I am hurrying off to Kano! “Jalla, jalla” as they say in Sweden nowadays after the movie...

20. living as an expat in tunis

Now that was a very, very long time ago and experiences that happened when one is four year old are not know to stick in one’s memory…

21. love versus hate

Yes, I wrote a post about that having been inspired by the NewAfrican. You will find it here.

22. move nigerien

Not exactly sure that you are thinking about… Why would I want to be moving Nigerien people around…? The whole point with Eden is helping them achieve a sustainable life right where they are.

23. nairobi

Niamey is actually the capital of Niger, not Nairobi. Nairobi is the capital of Kenya, which is different country. Many African bloggers reside there.

24. palm tree sweden

I hate to be the one to tell you, but there are no natural palm trees growing in Sweden. It’s a cold country! You will find a lot of palm trees in Africa however, especially around the coast...

25. peace

Yes, we like that!

26. people born in sub-saharan live in sweden

Lol, this is the direct opposite of myself! I was born in Sweden but now I live in sub-saharan Africa…

27. reasons for a dog, reasons having a dog, reasons for having a dog, reasons to having a dog, best things about having a dog

There really is no end to it, is there? Either you have a dog or you don’t! Do you really need anyone’s permission…?

28. riding fast on a camel

No, no, no, I never do that (being such a sensible girl). Truth is, I can hardly keep myself ON a camel. However, I like to race my mare and that hits about 55 km/h. So much for being sensible..?

29. snygging english, snygging means, snygging swedish to english translation

You never give up, do you? Very well, I will say it now, once and for all. “Snygging” in Swedish is “Gorgeous” in English, but used in much more informally.

30. sultan palace zinder

Nostalgic about it? Here’s a post, showing the palace and a very, very blue Nigerien sky!

31. things to take to nigeria

Well, first (and mainly), I would recommend a winning smile, a lot of patience and your FRIENDSHIP! In other words, never go to Nigeria without your humour! If you wonder what I mean, read the comments on the post Departure Approaching...

32. who is ishtar

Well… Who am I? Sorry, not in a philosophizing mood today. I'll give you a clue though: she's a pretty cheerful blond girl working as a volunteer in the heart of Western Africa. Next question please!

33. "anette b" volunteer niger

Yes, Anette is coming back and will be staying for a LOOOONG time this time! You can read about it on her blog!

More keywords coming up next month. Hope you enjoyed them!

Ishtar

Departure approaching!

Today, I called the Nigerian embassy, and hurray, our visa applications are about to be signed and sent back to us! (Need I mention that I got nostalgic talking to a naija person again?) You always need a few days of marginal, to see that you got the right visa and that your post office didn't forget to inform you that your recommended package has arrived. I've had all sorts of adventures happening to me just as I am about to leave, but my years of youth seem to be over as I no longer long for that "extra thrill"... I just want to get down there without too many complications!

That said, it shouldn't be long now before Nettus and I are back in the pulsating city Kano, where we will stay for a short while before heading 6 hours north to Zinder, Niger.

Being big on continuity, we will (hopefully!) stay at the same hotel as always-

... and if there is no Teem (soft drink) available that particular week, I will settle for have a Chapman.

36 hours after leaving Sweden, I hope we will have arrived safely in Zinder, our final destination, where some major projects awaits us. The place is totally green now, as my brother and sister-in-law inform us, making the picture above slightly misgiving as it was taken several months after the rainy season (when the grass had dried). But you get the picture. In two weeks time, Nettus and I will be living and working in the second largest city of the least developed country in the world. In case I never told you, Zinder is a large city if you consider the space it takes up, but there are only about 360,000 inhabitants. Which is great for a girl in love with the outback!

Before any of this happens however, I have about a million little things to do: one of which is to contact KLM and see why the tickets haven't arrived yet... Will be thrilled when I can put all these administrative details behind me and get to work with the things that really matter!

Hope you're all having a good week!

Ishtar

One animal specie that will never make it to the ark...

As much as I love pets in general, there are some species I have never felt the need to own. Peacocks are definitively a most amazingly beautiful animal, but knowing what they sound like and how early they awaken in the morning, I have known for many decades that I would never follow the expat cue and get myself these large birds!

And with the bird flue warnings that are alerted in Niger on a regular basis, I will even postpone getting myself some hens... Perhaps in the end, Anette and I will stick to our horses, our dog(s) and our potential goats.

Ishtar

Beautiful Africa's 3rd edition coming up soon!

Just a reminder to let you know that the beautiful Africa blog carnival is due on August 16th. As written on the Beautiful Africa homepage:

Time to read through your blog again and look at the posts you've written (in order to see if there is anything amidst all the lines that you've already written that has captured a Beautiful African issue in a positive or constructive way); or, to sit down and write something according to your heart's desire. Will not post site promotions (hotels & rentals), off-topic issues or negative rants however, so if you want to portray a problem, you need to offer some sort of a solution as well... Constructiveness is the key!

You can submit your contribution by clicking here.

Greetings,
Ishtar & The BA team

Relationships in a world of epithets

One of the most complicated things about Niger is relationships. They are not the least complicated when you are there, but are very much so when you are absent.

Before leaving for Sweden this year, I made a deal with my jockey, whom I had a very high opinion of. He told me that he was tired of touring and that he wanted to stay with his family in Zinder, working exclusively with my horses (personal loyalty is such a huge issue in Niger). I perceived him as genuine (in being tired of touring, because I knew he loved his little girls), and I decided to give it a try. "No one would be happier than me," I told him, "but if you're going to live of my horses and my horses only, then you need a raise. I don't need you now, but I do need you later on." All cards were put on the table; I told him what I needed, what I expected (and what I would be paying for!), and an agreement was made.

For the first two months, things seemed to be going well. Yaronbaba came regularly and rode out the horses, sometimes to the track, sometimes to the bush. He had my full confidence and I knew the freedom of action was important to him.

In my absence however, something must have happened, for three days ago, I was informed that he had told the workers that he was not actually working for me, but was just "helping out a bit". In fact, he had so many other things to do (read: touring) that he hadn't been to ride my horses during the whole month of July (!). This was not what we had agreed upon.

I don't know what saddened me the most; loosing my confidence in him or the fact that he of all people had told an untruth (and being irritated when doing so). He, my Nigerien brother, who so enjoyed being taken for real, being treated as an equal, who thought truth was the foundation for trust and all those things we kept talking about. His recent behavior was a sudden and dramatic change of character, and such a drastic change that I had trouble believing it at first. What had happened that made him pull out, and why on earth did he start lying about it?

Being so far away, I do not have the answers. I have no idea what went wrong. It could have been lack of money. It could have been lack of prestige as well, because although I make people feel equal when I'm there (by not letting people carry things for me or greet me with two hands as a sign of submission, or bowing (!) when they receive their well earned salary etc), they don't seem to be able to hold on to that dignity when I'm not around, which the entire society telling them that a man in Niger is judged by his tasks. Niger is full of epithets. If you ride a horse for someone, it places you as "the little one who rides the horse to the track". If you are a jockey, then you cannot ride a horse to the track as that is a lowly job; and hence, you need a motorcycle, even if this eats up better part of your salary.

In the beginning, I really enjoyed going to the track and turning a very narrow world upside down. Since owning a horse was one of the highest signs of "social accomplishments", it gave me a immense platform for social development.

In a world of epithets, I was the only "woman" to own a horse (which made me a man, lol!), the only "horse owner" to actually ride her own horses, the only "important person" to sit down on the ground and mingle with the "lowly people", and the only "trainer" who offered my jockey to drink from the same water bottle as herself! There was no end to my inspiration, which was only fueled by the fact that the most prominent "accomplished people" were following suit! All of a sudden, horse owners started to touch their own horses, sit on the ground and "mingle with the lowly people", train their horses Swedish racing manner etc. I was thrilled - and I must admit: slightly hooked. The racetrack became my playground.

There was one big catch however. Despite my good intentions, the racetrack setting (featuring all the who's whos of Zinder) just didn't bring out the best of me. I remember one discussion I had with God, coming back from the track after having publicly humiliated my former jockey. I seem to possess a talent in the art of making people I dislike feel uncomfortable about themselves, and this guy had really let me down. But the one I answer to wasn't as pleased with me as I was. When coming home, a very simple question popped up in my heart, breaking my train of thoughts:

"Do you think that what you did today will inspire him to become a better person?"

The question startled me. I was on the verge of defending myself, but in the same moment that the question had been raised, I knew the answer to it. No, taunting a broken soul publicly was not going to inspire him to become a better person. The only thing that had been proven was my talent in fighting with words. I had used the right words, but had the wrong desire, and what I had done might in fact have a worse effect on him than had I just concentrated on forgiving. I was ashamed of myself, and taken aback. Why did I - despite my good intentions - join the line of people who live to achieve their own means? It definitively gave me something to think about.

Now, the recent discussion with some of the most prominent programmers with interest in Africa has taught me one very valuable lesson. You can either spend your energy discussing and arguing in order to point out other people's faults and mistakes. Or, you can leave those things behind you and go do something constructive with your life.

Putting it simple: the rac track is not my turf, and it does not bring out the best of me. Yaronbaba's recent behavior suddenly made a previously difficult choice very easy for me. When the last jockey disappointed me, I broke with him but not with the track. This time, I will break with the track, but not with the person who disappointed me. And the funny thing is that although loosing my jockey would seemingly give me less liberty, it frees me of the (unwanted) social obligations that I have somehow managed to take upon me, concerning the forum for all the who's whos of Zinder.

Let them have their track. The horses were meant to be a blessing, not a curse. I want to live my life feeling alive and in tune with my heart's desires, and the challenge that lies ahead of me - in contributing to help the poorest of the poor achieve a sustainable life - calls for my full attention.

Ishtar

Worlds apart

Copyright Eden Foundation

In May this year, I came across a Swedish article that dealt with the findings of a recent report about which country was considered the best for mothers to raise their children in. The report based its findings on issues such as health care standards, female life expectancy, education, financial inequality between the sexes, parental insurance, female involvement in politics, child mortality rate and many things more. Sweden came out at the very top and Niger at the very bottom, which was reason enough for me to blog about it, seeing I am connected with both.

The findings did not take into account however that in Sweden, toddlers are being left at daycare centers for longer shifts than ordinary work hours, because their parents need to work more, in order to gain more. When I worked as a teacher in Sweden, it really saddened me that there were so many broken families. Far too often, parents had far too little time to spend with their children, who felt unloved and acted accordingly. It didn't help that the parents tried to "buy their love" with material things, when all they wanted was for their parents to spend some time with them.

So who are the lucky ones, really? The ones who are surrounded by material wealth but have no time with their parents, or the ones who are included in society from the very start, but have few comforts to enjoy?

You see, to me, the challenge about helping is to bring about sustainable development without trampling what is already there. And believe me, Africa has many treasures.

Ishtar

Just wanted to remind you all

...that today is another beautiful day!

Warm greetings,
Ishtar

My mistake

After some consideration, I have decided to remove my recent post "Will technology solve Africa's problems?" because it just didn't feel right. One of the things that I have so greatly enjoyed since I started blogging has been the pleasant atmosphere at Ishtar News. Perhaps not so surprisingly since the general note of my writing has been positive and/or constructive? Anyway, Friday evening saw me frustrated and in defense mode, adding an unnecessary salty note to my response which I actually thought I had outgrown by now. Although there are always points to be made and added about "the packaging of Africa solutions" as Izz so neatly put it, there was nothing constructive about me going into somebody else's turf and having my say when I had nothing constructive to add. Hence my mistake. :-)

That said, I may very well rewrite an article about technology vs life quality (or a similar subject) at an other time, but then on a constructive note! Life is just too short to dwell on the things you don't agree with.

Copyright Eden Foundation

As for romanticizing about poverty, this blog will just have to speak for itself. There is no glamor about poverty, but there can be genuine life quality nonetheless. If it weren't so, I don't think I would long so much for the 45 degrees Celsius, the slow-slow pace forward (remember what I said about non-existing stress?), the constant electricity cuts & water shortages that hinders you in your work and makes your computers melt; as well as the cockroaches creeping out of your shower or the geckos in your wardrobe - unless there was something really special that outweighed it!

Copyright Eden Foundation

And that reminds me: tomorrow, Nettus and I will be booking our plane tickets to Niger - hurray!

Ishtar

Precious moments

Our lives are filled with precious moments, but often we're so busy we don't have the time to notice, and that is makes them so rare. Sometimes we're sad and lonely, and that takes the joy away as well. But life makes so much more sense if we look at what we have, instead of what we're lacking. I have always marveled at how the fingerless and toeless leprous of Zinder can possess such genuine and immense joy. I am not kidding when I say that we - "the developed" - have a lot to learn from the poor.

So take a moment. Look around and see all the things you have to be grateful of. Spend some time with the people that matter. Listen to what others have to say. Do something for someone else that you think will make a big difference in his/her life. You'll be surprised at how much you gain from it yourself.

We only live once, and although we seem to be spending most of our time chasing that outstanding dream that is meant to give us the recognition we've been wanting for so long, it's in fact the little things that count and that add up to a life filled with satisfaction.

One day when walking through the market of Zinder, I will stop by and ask the leprous how come they are always so cheerful. Perhaps they will not know why, but there is a chance that they will give me a seemingly unlogical answer. Why? Because it will probably be very existentialistic and very simple; and the world I was born into doesn't care for simple answers.

But once you've met the lepers, you will go through life wondering how people whose hands and feet are withering away can possess such genuine joy. You will look for the small things that make life so valuable; and once you've found it, you'll will not understand how you could ever do without. That, to me, is life quality, built on seemingly simple little precious moments that add up and give my life meaning and joy.

And just imagine: it's there for everyone.

Ishtar

A simple reflection

Copyright Eden Foundation

It's funny how the world has been cut out. Some have all the comfort in the world, but no time to enjoy it. Some have all the time in the world, but no comforts to enjoy.

If we can share and learn from each other, then we have already come a long way.

Ishtar

Did you know?

Copyright Eden Foundation

There are 250,000 known plant species in the world, but only 20 of them provide 90% of our food. Eden believes that the key to prosperity for the poor lie in underexploited, edible trees and bushes - the lost treasures of Eden.

The solution is out there and it is so simple. As long as the goal is to aim for people to achieve a sustainable life.

The funny thing is that the more "developed" our world becomes, the more complicated solutions do we look for. All over the blog world, I see people striving to make Africa a more Western place. "Let's bring development to Africa!" "Let's bring education and technology!"

To me, it's not my job to change the habit of culture. That is for Africa to do on its own. If it wants our Western lives with lonely patterns, then fine, by all means, go ahead. But I won't push for it. In fact, it would only make me very, very sad. My job however is to allow for people to lead a sustainable life. To have food on the table and the freedom to develop in whatever way they want.

Somehow, the Western world got confused about aid; thinking it was about directing people in whatever manner that would suit their politics. You hold an enormous power when it is your hand that distributes the bread - perhaps it is a human fault to never be able to withstand the temptation of commandeering over others. Perhaps we have so low values that we only measure ourselves in our ability to control others. I don't know.

What really saddens me however is when I see the intellectuals of Africa striving for Africa to make a name for itself on the global scene. As if Africa would even want to compare with the Western World.

People may say that I am romanticizing, but my take on the issue is very simple. When people no longer go hungry, they flourish. They rise and they start to act. Let them develop in their own way according to their own heart's desires and do not meddle for the sake of your own recognition.

Copyright Eden Foundation

Ishtar

Ishtar News statistics

Since the 1st of June when I started looking at the statistics (prior to then, I was only blogging for the fun of it - still am by the way!), Ishtar News has had over 1000 unique visitors. Visitor loyalty is a 46%, meaning that every second person who ends up here comes back again. 54 people have come back more than fifty times. Now being really B!G (as Izz would say!) on continuity, I must say: I like that! I'd rather blog for a handful of people that I "know" myself (whether we've met in person or not), than for an entire community that only writes a comment in the hope of leaving a trace. By the way, I am reading everywhere about people getting rude and hostile comments on their blogs. Luckily, my blog is still so small that it hasn't happened to me!

That said, I will be posting July month's favorite keyword (what is it with people and their unhealthy interest in Ishtar's sunbathing habits?) in a few days. In the meantime, I created a little poll for you to enter what keyword you thought was the top July keyword, after "Ishtar" and surprisingly, "Hanna Grönberg" - my restless friend who has a very wide global social network. I'm honored to be your friend Hanna!

Now I only need to find a picture that matches with this post. Won't be easy, for rare are the moments when I have been working with statistics in any kind, and even rarer are the times when a photographer caught me doing so! I do however have pictures of me fiddling with the camera!

Isn't it amazing what blonds can do these days? We're turning into a high-tech species!

Ishtar

Ramblings

Sometimes you write things without knowing what you want to say. Other times you know exactly what you want to say, but you don't know how to say it. Both cases make you ramble, but mine is of the latter variant.

I can't explain what is happening right now, because it's new to me. I've never been down this road before. I've never felt so little or so helpless in my entire life (actually, I've never BEEN so little and helpless in my entire life!) but it's ok, because I am being carried by someone far greater than myself right now, and that makes the walk on water so effortless and easy.

Everyday I go to work, people ask me how I'm doing. They expect to hear the worst, but I don't know how to answer them. Life is good, amidst all the set-backs. When I stay on a particular spot, my ground is steady and I am unaffected by the wailing storms. How do I explain the surreal? How do I explain feeling joy in the shadow of death? I know I sound insane, but the funny thing is that people understand. They look at me, nod, and say they understand. Perhaps it's not so amazingly weird after all?

I used to think of myself as a person who had many answers. I used to strive hard to be in control, and my freedom was important to me. Financial independence was A and O; maybe even more important than doing something really valuable with my life.

Today, I see my values have changed. I do not long for personal independence anymore. Instead, I long for that silent whisper that speaks so clearly in my heart (which is does, when I really take the time to listen). As humans, we need each other all the time. It's a give and take, and the giving just makes you richer.

The weirdest thing is that life is turning out so different from anything I ever planned. But I am grateful, because this feels right. For so many years, I trained in the art of running my life. Now I train in the art of living it. And I like it so much better!

Ishtar